Insecurities
05 April 2015 | 11:05 PTG | 0 comments
I would love to share with you guys my point of view on insecurities.
I used to feel insecure about every single thing in my life. Aku dulu selalu rasa diri aku tak guna untuk semua orang. Aku dulu selalu tertekan sebab selalu rasa diri aku ni tak cukup itu ini. Aku selalu menangis sebab tak dapat puaskan hati semua orang. Kau pernah tak tengok cermin kau benci apa yang kau nampak? Because I've used to hate my own body. Selalu tak bersyukur dengan apa yang aku ada & akhirnya aku belajar buang semua perasaan tu jauh jauh. Aku dah buang jauh jauh perasaan "insecure" aku.
So i think perempuan dengan insecure. mana boleh dipisahkan. Pantang stalk perempuan cantik dekat instagram/facebook/twitter, you will feel like you are worthless. Aku rasa semua orang rasa insecure kot. lelaki ke perempuan ke dua dua sama je insecure.
Kalau perempuan, bila bf tak mesej or call or anything, you will overthinking about it, and mula lah fikir dia ada orang lain, dah tak sayang kau or anything. Insecure ni kadang kadang tak elok juga. Kalau bf pandang perempuan lain, mesti rasa diri ni tak macam perempuan yang bf kita pandang tu. Ok yang paling latest, bila bf like gambar perempuan dekat instagram/facebook, mula lah assume macam macam.
Kalau lelaki pulak, insecure dia lain sikit. Bila text or call tu mesti fikir "aku call ni lambat sangat ke or awal sangat" something like that. Sebab kadang kadang terlepas pandang or busy sekejap dah tak reply mesej gf or bila lepak dengan kawan memang tak pegang phone and yes mostly guys are insecure about their looks. Contoh bila gf pandang lelaki lain or anything. They just want to be the best untuk pasangan masing masing sebenarnya and kadang kadang lelaki pun ada fikir diri ni cukup baik tak untuk gf dia. Rasa insecure lelaki dengan perempuan sama je. Bila dua dua dah sayang. Mutual feelings, gitu.
Bagi perempuan, ada tak orang pernah cakap dekat kau, dalam gambar cantik, in real life tak cantik. Pernah tak? Because most of my friends selalu cakap macam tu when we were hanging out and talk about girls and yes i think they are fools & yes yang selalu cakap dalam gambar lain, in reality life lain. Of course lah lain. Kalau rasa sama dalam gambar & in reality, you need some reality check. Obviously lah tak sama. Apa benda lah? Bodoh agaknya.
As a human being, its normal feel insecure about so many things.
Contoh insecure in friendship,
"I am the last person my friends would willingly hang out with. I don’t understand what i’ve done wrong. I don’t get why they all dislike me so much. I don’t get what more i have to do to make them like me. I don’t understand."
Dalam friendship, bila kita rasa kawan kawan kita tak perlukan kita.
Insecure ni bagus juga kadang kadang. Tunjuk yang kita sayang & nak jadi yang terbaik untuk dia tapi terlalu insecure will ruin relationship tu. Sebab bila terlalu overthinking, assume things and stuff.
Overthinking boleh lead to insecure bila kau keluar pakai baju baru and kau rasa okay je kau pakai baju je and untill someone pandang kau pelik, slack & atas bawah, kau mesti rasa dorang kutuk kau dalam hati.
Bila selalu bandingkan diri dengan orang lain, kau akan selalu rasa insecure. So stop compare diri kau dengan orang lain. Tak elok. Kau ada keistimewaan kau tersendiri. Dia pun ada. Allah Maha Adil.
Elakkan kutuk diri sendiri. Contoh "aku ni dahla bodoh, tak lawa, tak ada siapa nak aku" "aku makin gemuk. aku hodoh." "aku makin hitam. tak ada siapa suka aku." stop saying all of that. You need to feel good about yourself. Persetankan negative thoughts. Someday someone somewhere will accept you and your flaws.
Aku rasa semua orang ada rasa perasaan insecure tak kira lah dalam relationship or in a friendship. Semua akan rasa insecure. For me, i think rasa insecure ni bahaya because something bad will happen bila kita terlalu insecure. Kalau kita tak yakin dengan diri kita, macam mana kita nak orang yakin dengan diri kita? Ask yourself.
I myself gugup depan public. Lagi lagi kena cakap depan orang ramai. You tell me now siapa je yang tak nervous? yang tak nervous tu maybe dia pandai hide dia punya nervous or dah berpengalaman.
For those yang insecure sangat dalam hidup. I have few tips. First, don't let your insecurites get the best of you. Buang perasaan insecure ni jauh jauh or else you will end up suffering. Don't you ever feed your insecurities.
Jangan pernah rasa diri kurang itu ini. Learn how to be thankful. You know, semua manusia ada kelemahan & kelebihan masing masing and it's normal to have flaws. It's normal to make and made mistakes. Sometimes, kena belajar feel good about yourself and stop give a fuck about what people think of you. Kena confident dengan diri sendiri. What is important for you now, is to feel good about yourself. Your own body, how you dress, how you confront society, how you gain friends. Be yourself, that is the best thing you can do.
Jauhi orang yang buat kita rasa insecure, yang buat kita rasa diri kita ni tak bernilai. Get rid of them. you should surround yourself with good, positive vibes and people, not negative vibes & people. Ok?
Sebab bila kita lepak, or chilling with those people yang buat kita punya self esteem down, kita akan lagi tak rasa diri kita ni worthy and please please avoid that kind of people.
Sometimes you have to accept the fact that you are actually worthy and yes, selalu fikir positif. We can't please people. Orang suka ke tak suka kita ke, it's not our problems. Just keep on doing what you have to do & focus on what matters. There is no point of entertaining fools. Let them be. Lama lama senyap lah dorang tu. Always think positive and forgive those people who hurt your feelings. Then you can be happy. Forgive but you don't have to forget. Always remember those people who hurt you. So that, you know in future which one you can turn to when you are in trouble and yes appreciate mereka yang still stay dengan kita & terima apa ada kita.
Don't take things for granted. Always be thankful.
Insecure ni banyak benda boleh dikaitkan dalam hidup seharian kita,
Dalam dunia ni, it's not always about sayang orang lain. Firstly, kita kena sayang diri kita dulu baru kita boleh sayang orang lain. Bila insecure pasal kulit, think about orang yang kulit dia lagi teruk. Bila insecure pasal badan, think about orang yang badan dia kurus sangat and then susah nak gain weight. It's okay to be imperfect.
That makes us human.
Kita tak pernah pandang diri kita, macam mana kita pandang orang lain.
Jangan peduli apa orang cakap. Buatlah apa yang kita rasa boleh boost self esteem kita. Self confidence kita. yang boleh buat kita feel good dengan diri kita. Buatlah. Pakailah. Just do what makes you happy.
One piece of advice,
You can't be perfect, but you can feel good about yourself.
Because, you insecurities are ruining your life.
Hajja {16}. Malaysian. Alor Setar, Kedah. I am multi fandoms.